In 2019, we want to come to "boutte" rather than becoming a mother to "boutte"!
We will soon say goodbye to 2018, the year that saw the birth of the Moth phenomenon. A few days from 2019, because I love you very much and out of a spirit of solidarity, I wish you to come to boutte rather than transforming yourself into a mother to boutte! I want to collectively wish us fewer mothers in boutte. (Hear me right, I'm talking about the phenomenon and not the 5 girls on the show!) It's obvious: being a 2.0 mother is a particularly difficult job, which forces us to work with zeal. For all kinds of reasons, the role of mother has become more complex over time and I understand that most of us can, at times, feel overwhelmed. What if we could portray our family life, our children and our spouse with more optimism? It seems to me that we would come to see life from a different angle! I wish us to overcome our frustrations. Author Nadine Bismuth wrote it well in her latest novel "A Family Link". I really want to use his words because I could not say better. She writes : "Maybe this is growing old: realizing that nothing is ideal, swallowing up your whims and expectations, forgetting your needs for the benefit of others. Because there is no doubt that my family is a larger entity than me now: it is a cell that takes precedence over my desires and that absorbs my whole person. " It’s indisputable, parenting has its share of difficulties and frustrations! I wish we were able to overcome it, or at least manage to minimize it. In the life of a parent, there are a multitude of very simple little pleasures to hold on to. It is still necessary to be able to detect them and ignore the tree that hides the forest. Here's a tip to try: when your mother duties are overwhelming, turn on your phone and take a look at the ton of photos and videos of your kids. There are a ton of these little plots of happiness in our cellphones! These images of our family life are only happy moments, milestones, little landmarks for the times when it is more difficult. Watch a video of her daughter singing loudly bobetteswearing sunglasses, standing on a kitchen chair and reliving that moment makes you smile! It helps to forgive her for the mess she made in the living room. It motivates from the washing machine for the 2etimes of the day and vacuum before going to bed. I wish us to overcome rigidity. Sometimes the line is thin between everything is fine and everything changes. There are days when you get an idea of what the day will look like and ultimately circumstances (or rather the kids!) Decide otherwise. Having worked for several years as an elementary school teacher, I understood that working with small humans means being ready to change plans at all times. We had planned a good pad thai for supper, but since their return from school, the two oldest have been bickering and the little one has been clamoring for our arms. Do you dare to serve them some vegetables and a peanut butter sandwich? Sometimes it makes more sense to focus on what is most important. When we need a lot of energy to discipline our children and keep order, we put less on other things. I wish us to overcome the negative social pressure. It's a fact, our house has to be clean, but it doesn't have to be Pinterest. It is a fact, our children need to be stimulated, but they do not have to do swimming, yoga, painting, hockey and piano lessons at the same time. It is a fact, our children have to eat vegetables but these do not have to be star cut so that we can feel like a good mother. Yes we want to be a woman too, but our nails can remain natural. Ideally, we need to stay in shape but we don't need to become a fitness mom. I wish us to put our energy in the right place and stop scattering ourselves through futile details. In 2019, we put the focus on what matters most to us, we unclutter our time slots and we get rid of the frivolous stuff that basically, bring us very little. I wish us to come a little at the end of the mental load. We talk about the mental burden of mothers and we often portray fathers as incapable. They are accused of their lack of commitment and resourcefulness. If in 2019, they were really given the chance to take their place in the family. If we delegated certain things to them, without being behind them to ensure that everything was done as we would have done, by our standards. Fathers take a different look at family life. They carry out the tasks with a certain letting go and we should sometimes be inspired by them. Children too can participate in family life and reduce the burden on us. I wish us to cultivate the team spirit within our family. I wish us to overcome the phenomenon I am "butted" and I assume. All mothers agree that keeping a house clean when you have children is painful, that our floors are sometimes dirtier than they should be. We certainly all agree that arguing with a child to stay in bed once and for all the evening is exasperating. Of course, we often need to ventilate and seek a little solidarity from other mothers. However, don't you find that quotes from parents at the edge are a little too present on social networks? Isn't it a shame to leave so much room for the negative aspects of parenting? With a little effort, we could restore a little luster to the image of parenthood and restore these letters of nobility. At Les Belles Combines, in 2019, we will try to plant small seeds of positivism with moms. We will do everything we can to help you test solutions and feel competent in your role as mother. We will put all our energy to help you better manage your time and empower other family members! And you will see…. together we will come to boutte!