Autonomy Guide: The Update That Helps Your Kids Grow

Spring is the perfect time to dust off your autonomy guide and adapt it to your children's development. In this text, discover how a simple update of this tool can transform your family dynamic and propel your children's development to new heights.

The virtuous circle of autonomy

As Dominique Bernèche, founder of Les Belles Combines, so rightly points out in her book Les Belles Combines : "children who are given the power to do things for themselves have a strong tendency to have confidence in their abilities and to be proud and happy with what they accomplish."

This approach towards autonomy creates a real virtuous circle in the family. The more opportunities we offer children to develop their autonomy, the more they gain confidence and motivation. This confidence pushes them to become more involved in family life, which naturally lightens the burden on parents. With more time and energy, parents can then invest in quality time and in supporting new skills.

Why a spring update?

Spring is more than just a change of seasons. This time of renewal in nature resonates especially with our children’s development. Their physical and cognitive abilities have evolved since fall, as have their interests and need for independence.

The longer days and renewed energy of spring create a favorable context for new learning. It is also the ideal time to prepare for summer autonomy, a period when children will have more opportunities to exercise their independence. Day camps offer many opportunities to manage their personal belongings and lunch on their own. Pool days allow them to develop their autonomy in applying sunscreen or managing their change of clothes. In addition, the less structured rhythm of summer, without the usual school constraints, naturally creates times when children must take initiative: organize their free time, prepare their snacks, manage their outdoor activities, and even plan small activities with their friends. These occasions, although simple, are opportunities to exercise their judgment and develop their confidence in their abilities.

The 6-level guide: An evolving guide for personalized support

Developed in collaboration with our psychology expert, Ms. Laurence Morency-Guay, our autonomy guide covers seven essential areas of development: food, clothing, hygiene care, help with domestic life, time structure, financial and environmental education. This comprehensive approach allows us to support the child in all aspects of their development, while respecting their uniqueness. Because like the different branches of a tree that grow according to their exposure to the sun, each area progresses at its own pace. A child can excel in certain areas while needing more support in others, and this is precisely where our role as parents takes on its full importance.

Like a high jump coach, we must set the bar at the right level for each skill. A bar that is too low offers no challenge and does not allow for progression, while too high, it discourages and demotivates. The art of coaching lies in this delicate balance: offering a stimulating but achievable challenge, which pushes the child to surpass himself while remaining within his possible development zone. This diversity in development is not only normal, it is enriching and allows us to adjust our support according to the specific needs of each child.

A special moment of connection and empowerment

The monthly or seasonal review of the autonomy guide is much more than just monitoring progress. It is a valuable opportunity to put the child at the center of his development. By clearly explaining our expectations and listening to him express his own goals, we give him the keys to his autonomy. You will often be surprised to see how much children can take charge of their development when given the opportunity, while guiding and supporting them in their learning.

This moment allows you to:

• Discuss your successes and challenges;

• Understanding your perception of your abilities;

• Establish realistic goals together;

• Make him responsible for his development;

• Strengthen your bond by celebrating their progress.

The importance of recognition

Recognizing progress plays a central role in developing autonomy. It nourishes self-esteem and encourages perseverance. By valuing not only results, but also efforts and the approach, we fuel this virtuous circle where confidence leads to more initiatives, and initiatives to more confidence.

Privileges and responsibilities: a natural balance

As autonomy increases, it naturally comes with new privileges, but also responsibilities. This relationship is not so much about rewards as it is about recognizing the child's growing abilities. By explaining this connection, we help our children understand that autonomy is a natural and positive process in their development. Check out our full article with suggestions for age-appropriate privileges here.

Tools to support you

The Belles Combines autonomy guide is available in a printable version for your family organization binder, but also in an interactive version in the Octave application. Children particularly enjoy checking off their new acquisitions in the application, thus transforming the development of their autonomy into a fun and rewarding experience.

💡 Pro tip: Set a seasonal reminder for the guide update!

📱 In Octave : Create a recurring task “Update autonomy guide” 
📅 Paper version: Note the dates in your Les Belles Combines paper planner.

Conclusion: cultivating autonomy together

Developing autonomy is a journey that parents and children take together. By engaging in this process, we set in motion a process that benefits the entire family: more confident children, more available parents, and a more harmonious family dynamic. As Dominique Bernèche says so well: "Once the process is well-oiled, we are a united, proactive and happy family!"

🚀 Find this article and much more in the Octave app: shared calendar, collaborative task list, meal planner, centralization of family information and autonomy monitoring - your number 1 ally for an organized family life! 📱✨